Toxic Friendship

[Cdeez]

So there was this girl. She was bullied brutally by the entire grade to the point she almost committed suicide. I stood up for her and we became friends but she became quite controlling and didn't like me spending time with other people. A few more traits of a toxic friendship was seen . My other friends told me about it as well but I didn't really pay attention. She randomly sends me messages implying she wants to suicide because I just told her she was wrong and tell her about my feelings. She ditches me a lot now a days and thinks she's too cool for me, yet when she needs me she wants me to be faithful to her only. Anytime I disagree she again says she wants to commit suicide. What should I do? I don't want to part on bad terms. Last time she started the dead business and I threatened to report her. She also talks to my enemies behind my back..I have no problem with that but the thing is she expects me not to talk to people she doesn't like. Plus she blabs of stuff I tell her specifically not to tell others..What should I do?

[Monsoon]

Hey Cdeez. Thanks for coming to us for support - we are here to help you

 

I'm sorry to hear that you've been going through this. It must be hard when she is ditching you and thinking she is too cool for you. Before I give you advice, can I just check, is your friend safe? It sounds like she is really struggling mentally and could do with some support. Do you think she has a plan to take her own life? If so, here is some useful information for her:

 

We support Monday - Friday, 9am - 5.30pm (BST) via our communityhttps://www.ditchthelabel.org/community/ - You could give her the community link and we will be able to support her directly. There are more options below:

 

UK: The Samaritans - 116 123 (This is a 24/7 service)

USA: NSPL - 1-800-273-8255 (This is a 24/7 service)

This link will give you a list of all crisis lines worldwide: https://www.befrienders.org

 

You can also call your doctor or go to any emergency department and ask for help.

 

This situation is a tricky one really. From what you've said, it sounds like your friend is really going through a hard time which can lead to behaviours like you've described. Do you know if she is getting any kind of help? It would be helpful for you to speak to her parents if you feel like she is in any kind of danger.

 

In your situation, I think that you just have to be open and honest about the friendship with her. If you don't want to be friends with her anymore, having a calm conversation about why it's not working for you might help to leave it on good terms. You could also tell her what's going wrong at the moment and give her another chance. She might not be able to see how her actions are affecting you. What do you think? Also, here’s a support guide on friendships: https://www.ditchthelabel.org/8-step...-toxic-friend/

 

Let me know what you think of this. Speak soon!

 

-Monsoon