What qualifies genderqueer?

[AncientHistoryBook]

hey. I wrote a post earlier saying I was gender queer, but I'm still doubting. It just seems like it's happening really fast. Like, 4 months ago I was 100% sure I was a cis straight woman. I know now I'm pan. Also, I've only experienced chest dysphoria badly once, like 2 weeks ago, and then this week it's confusing because I know I don't feel female. But like in the morning every time I look in a mirror it reminds me that I am biologically female and it makes me feel horrible. But by like halfway through the day it dies down and dysphoria is either not there or really mild. It just confuses me. (Also the dysphoria is mainly due to the fact that I have to wear a dress to school as the uniform, and I can't wear my hair in a bun because my school hat won't fit) Anyways, I don't really know what I'm asking. I guess I just kinda want affirmation that what I'm going through makes me not cis?

[Remi]

Hello @AncientHistoryBook ,

 

So genderqueer in my understanding is another word for non-binary. It is those with gender identity that exists outside of the masculine, feminine binary. Your gender identity and sexuality are separate so you can be pansexual and that has no bearing on your gender identity.

 

It must be hard that you have to wear something to school that makes you feel uncomfortable, could you start a petition to allow the girls to also wear trousers. There is no right or wrong way to be a woman or express your gender.

 

I cannot give you any confirmation that you are not cis because I just don't know only you can know this, unfortunately. It is normal to question your gender identity. You can acknowledge these feelings without having to chose to act on them.

 

Could you try keeping a journal log of all of your feelings around gender, maybe you could put a spectrum on there and note where you feel each day.

 

-Remi

[AncientHistoryBook]

Omg that's such a good idea I'll definitely keep a journal now thank you!