melanie.007 Posted January 5, 2021 Share Posted January 5, 2021 I really like being reffered to Melanie or Mel. I will be turning 14 on the 27th of February. I've been feeling trapped in my own body for almost 2 years. I feel like I am invisible,like I don't exist. I am extremely empathic,and I tend to help people around me. But when it comes to me needing help,there is no one around me. I'd really like for someone to finally notice the pain that I've been going throught,the depression and anxiety I have. I've been coping with tarot and witchcraft,but it's not doing it for me anymore. I want to be able to talk to someone about this. MultiQuote Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Monsoon Posted January 6, 2021 Share Posted January 6, 2021 Hey @melanie.007 I'm sorry that you have been experiencing depression and anxiety. It must be hard feeling like there is no one around you to help. We are here for you now, and you are not alone. How is everything going for you at the moment? MultiQuote Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
melanie.007 Posted January 6, 2021 Author Share Posted January 6, 2021 not so good,I just had a fight with my relatives. I've returned to one of my ex-best friend and they didn't react well. MultiQuote Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Monsoon Posted January 7, 2021 Share Posted January 7, 2021 Hey @melanie.007 I'm sorry to hear that you've just had a fight with your relatives. How are things with them now? Also, what happened with your ex-best friend? MultiQuote Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
melanie.007 Posted January 9, 2021 Author Share Posted January 9, 2021 they are the same,I don't talk with some of them. Things between me and my "ex-bestfrienf",now close friend,are pretty good,I just feel like something changed tho. It's making me feel pretty bad MultiQuote Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Monsoon Posted January 9, 2021 Share Posted January 9, 2021 Hey @melanie.007 I'm sorry to hear that things are still the same with your relatives. Do you think you might try to make up with them soon? Also, it's great that things are pretty good between you and your ex-bestfriend now. When you say you feel like something changed, what is it you feel is different? MultiQuote Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
melanie.007 Posted January 9, 2021 Author Share Posted January 9, 2021 The ones that are the most upset live abroad,and I think it'd be pretty hard to make up for it,but I'd still try. I don't know,it feels like something changed. I feel like he got tired of listening to what's been going on in my life,and that makes me feel pretty sad,because he's the only one that I could speak so sincerely about my life. Before my bond with him got so close,I would've thought that I could never speak about my past and my present without getting judged,but after,I felt so understood and accepted. I seriously don't want to lose my bond with him,and I'm trying my best to try and fix this. MultiQuote Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Monsoon Posted January 10, 2021 Share Posted January 10, 2021 Hello @melanie.007 Thank you for explaining that to me. It's hard when we feel like something has changed with someone that we care deeply about. I'm wondering, have you spoken to him about how you feel? It might be that he is going through something and hasn't communicated that with you. Open communication is the best way to keep bonds close. What do you think? MultiQuote Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
melanie.007 Posted January 14, 2021 Author Share Posted January 14, 2021 Hi Monsoon,sorry for replying now,I didn't see the notification. Some complications got between me and him,but we were able to fix them. I still feel so much doubt and sadness,I feel like it never gets better. I just want to end everything. My mental health is just getting so much worse,day by day, I opened a lot of times to him ,but i just feel so annoying afterwards. I always ask him how he's doing , and we promies that we'll not be lying to eachother,and he said he's good. I've made sure to let him know that if he wants to talk about something in particular,I'm here. MultiQuote Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Monsoon Posted January 14, 2021 Share Posted January 14, 2021 Hey @melanie.007 Thanks for getting back to me. I'm sorry to hear that you're feeling worse and worse everyday. I'm concerned that you are in a mental health crisis at the moment. I'm wondering, do you think it could be a good idea to tell someone close to you how you are feeling? Or a doctor, perhaps? I just want to make sure that you're safe as we care about you here at Ditch the Label. Also, this isn't an easy question to answer, but can I ask, do you currently have a plan to take your own life? I'm thinking, it would be a good idea for you to complete this safety plan. Maybe you could type our the answers in your response and we can talk about it? We are here for you, Melanie. I know you can get through this. Safety_Plan_and_Reasons_for_Living.pdf Also, remember, you can call a crisis line at any point for someone to talk to in an emergency: -UK: The Samaritans - 116 123 (This is a 24/7 service) -USA: NSPL - 1-800-273-8255 (This is a 24/7 service) -This link will give you a list of all crisis lines worldwide: https://www.befrienders.orgSafety_Plan_and_Reasons_for_Living.pdf MultiQuote Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
melanie.007 Posted January 15, 2021 Author Share Posted January 15, 2021 I will talk to:Monsoon/Pupa/baunsi I will seek help from:Pupa/baunsi I will calm myself by:painting/crying/talking to someone about it I will go to my safe space:my roon/Pupa's place My ideas for keeping safe:Calling/texting my friends (Only listing the ones that apply/partially apply) I an afraid of the unknown I have a responsibility and commitment to my friends I love and enjoy mt friends too much and could not leave them My family and friends might believe I did not love them I am afraid of the actual "act" of killing myself I kinda have hope that things will improve and the future will be happier I have a reason to live My reasons: My parents would go through my phone I'd leave baunsi and pupa alone I still didn't learn the banana spell by Nati Asia MultiQuote Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Monsoon Posted January 16, 2021 Share Posted January 16, 2021 Hello @melanie.007 Thanks for getting back to me. It's nice to hear about all of the positive aspects of your life and what could keep you here. How are you feeling today? Also, have you thought about maybe telling someone in your life, such as a doctor perhaps? They may be able to help you get support for your mental health. Speak soon, -Monsoon MultiQuote Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
melanie.007 Posted January 17, 2021 Author Share Posted January 17, 2021 Hi Monsoon. I can't say that I'm feeling alright,but I'm not as suicidal. Which is good. I've thought about talking to someone deeply about my feelings,but not a doctor. I'm seriously avoiding them. MultiQuote Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Monsoon Posted January 18, 2021 Share Posted January 18, 2021 Hello @melanie.007 It's good to hear that you are not as suicidal. Can I ask, how come you are seriously avoiding doctors? Also, how would it feel talking to someone else? MultiQuote Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
melanie.007 Posted January 24, 2021 Author Share Posted January 24, 2021 Sorry for replying now,I wasn't notified. I just hate doctors,I've always hated them. I am kinda scared of them tbh,I can't trust them. I don't really talk much,so talking to someone I really trust and have so much love for makes it much easier. MultiQuote Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Monsoon Posted January 25, 2021 Share Posted January 25, 2021 Hello @melanie.007 Sorry that you weren't notified of my reply - I have passed this onto the tech person to fix it. Although you've said you don't really talk much, I'm glad that you are talking to us. Being open when we are struggling is so important so that we can get help. Have you spoken to anyone recently in your life that you have a lot of love for and trust? I remember you saying that you feel like your friend was getting tired of listening to you, so I just wanted to check in. Also, I remember you saying that you've accepted going to a psychologist. Has that happened yet? If so, how was it? MultiQuote Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
melanie.007 Posted January 25, 2021 Author Share Posted January 25, 2021 I haven't really opened fully about my feelings since then,I just get scared of rejection. Every friday I get to meet up with my psychologist,she's pretty nice. MultiQuote Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Monsoon Posted January 26, 2021 Share Posted January 26, 2021 Hi @melanie.007 I get what you mean about the fear of rejection. When you last spoke about your feelings to someone other than myself, how did it feel? Also, I'm glad that you're meeting up with your psychologist every Friday and that she's nice. Have you taken anything useful away from it yet? If so, would you like to share it with us? MultiQuote Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
melanie.007 Posted January 27, 2021 Author Share Posted January 27, 2021 I have't talked with her about something special about her,just made my introduction. MultiQuote Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Monsoon Posted January 27, 2021 Share Posted January 27, 2021 Hi @melanie.007 Ahh, I see. Out of curiosity, what are you hoping to get out of therapy? Also, how are you feeling today? MultiQuote Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Minty83 Posted January 27, 2021 Share Posted January 27, 2021 @Monsoon Hi, I am new to this platform, please could you explain how it works? Thanks. MultiQuote Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Monsoon Posted January 27, 2021 Share Posted January 27, 2021 Hey @Minty83 Welcome to our platform. I'm one of the digital support mentors here and basically, our members come here and post about what's going on for them, and the support mentors then offer their advice. How are things for you at the moment? MultiQuote Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Minty83 Posted January 27, 2021 Share Posted January 27, 2021 @Monsoon Hi, thanks for your reply, things at the moment are going okay, I’ve been diagnosed 12 months ago with General Anxiety Disorder and have been medicated since. My therapist recommended reaching out to others during lockdown. I am hoping to reduce my medication dosage in the near future: I personally never wanted to be on medication but I felt at the time it was the only way to beat the trauma I had suffered. MultiQuote Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Monsoon Posted January 28, 2021 Share Posted January 28, 2021 Hi @Minty83 Thanks for reaching out to us and getting back to me so quickly I'm glad to hear that things are going okay for you at the moment. I get what you're saying about the medication as many people feel the same way too, but as you say, it was the only way for you to get through it. How is therapy going? Are you finding it useful? MultiQuote Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
melanie.007 Posted January 29, 2021 Author Share Posted January 29, 2021 I'm hoping that I'll finally stop feeling so empty all the time.I've been needing that for a long time now. Today is just like any other day,I don't have the motivation for anything. I feel like I'm slowly giving up. MultiQuote Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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