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Too early to come out?


Daya    

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I'm 13 (gonna turn 14 in June) and I'm going to high school next school year. Although I'm not allowed to date till I'm 15, I want to tell my parents just so they are prepared. I feel like it's too early and they would shame me or say it's a phase since I'm catholic and bi-sexual. I've had conversations about LGBT and it ends up with me feeling bad. I don't know if I should do it, I just know I want to.

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Hey @Daya

 

Welcome to our community! I can see you've been busy.

 

There is absolutely no rush to come out to your parents until you are ready. There is no correct age for some people they know at aged 6 and for others they alternate and change their sexuality throughout their teens. There is no age limit of when to be taken seriously.

 

You could wait until you are dating to tell them but if you feel like you would like them to know this about you the you could go for it now? Why do the conversations make you feel bad?

 

Remi

This Digital Mentor Account is no longer active.

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You can come out when ever you like. I've heard there are people who've reaslied they're gay at aged 11. And then people like me, I'm 18, who've only just been honest with themselves and agreed with myself that I like girls as well as guys.

I wonder why you can on,y date after you're 15? Is that a rule set by your parents? I mean, the decisions are: wait til 15, date someone, or tell them, or don;t. Mate, if you want to tell them, you can. It's entirely up to you. Have you told anyone else? Friends? Even an online friend? Being religious, too, shouldn't be a barrier; what ever someone says, you should feel proud of yourself for coming out; it's a big thing!

So, in short, if you feel you must tell them, find your preferred way, or time, to do so. If not, waiting until aged 15 is totally fine. But it is your decision, of course. But there isn't any rush, as Remi says, in coming out. As I said, I'm 18 and only came out to my mom a few weeks ago. I'm still questioning my sexuality now, so there isn't any rush in coming out and discovering yourself. You could wait, as Remi says, until you're dating and just explain then? Do what you believe is right.

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You can come out when ever you like. I've heard there are people who've reaslied they're gay at aged 11. And then people like me, I'm 18, who've only just been honest with themselves and agreed with myself that I like girls as well as guys.

I wonder why you can on,y date after you're 15? Is that a rule set by your parents? I mean, the decisions are: wait til 15, date someone, or tell them, or don;t. Mate, if you want to tell them, you can. It's entirely up to you. Have you told anyone else? Friends? Even an online friend? Being religious, too, shouldn't be a barrier; what ever someone says, you should feel proud of yourself for coming out; it's a big thing!

So, in short, if you feel you must tell them, find your preferred way, or time, to do so. If not, waiting until aged 15 is totally fine. But it is your decision, of course. But there isn't any rush, as Remi says, in coming out. As I said, I'm 18 and only came out to my mom a few weeks ago. I'm still questioning my sexuality now, so there isn't any rush in coming out and discovering yourself. You could wait, as Remi says, until you're dating and just explain then? Do what you believe is right.

Thank you for responding. I think why I can't date till 15 is because at 15 I'm considered a woman and I'll be in high school. I've told people about my sexuality, I don't mind. I've told so many people and I'm going to be in highschool and meet new people (and maybe possible lovers) so I want to prepare my mother so she can know once I date someone female or male and not get surprised.

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Hey @Daya

 

Welcome to our community! I can see you've been busy.

 

There is absolutely no rush to come out to your parents until you are ready. There is no correct age for some people they know at aged 6 and for others they alternate and change their sexuality throughout their teens. There is no age limit of when to be taken seriously.

 

You could wait until you are dating to tell them but if you feel like you would like them to know this about you the you could go for it now? Why do the conversations make you feel bad?

 

Remi

The conversations feel bad because I was raised to not be gay or trans and yet I fell into it and can't get out.

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