leanne Posted July 21, 2020 Share Posted July 21, 2020 I am a girl. My first kiss was my girl best friend in 5th grade. We messed around, and I got butterflies when I thought about seeing her. As strange as it sounds, I still identified as straight. Didn't think anything of it. In 6th grade, I moved schools and found a new best friend. We became very close and I was really nervous around her. I thought she was beautiful. In 7th grade, we actually starting "dating", but everyone thought we were best friends. She was my first love, my first heartbreak. After her, I was single for years. It's been several years and I dream about her a few times a week. I've been in a committed relationship with a man for a couple of years now, and I love him a lot. But I feel guilty that I've never felt the sexual energy and desire with him that I did with girls. I feel guilty that I have fantasies about women. What does this mean? How do I deal with it? Why is it so hard? MultiQuote Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Remi Posted July 21, 2020 Share Posted July 21, 2020 Hello Leanne, Welcome to our community, The first thing I want to say is just - please don't panic! This is totally normal. Sexuality is such a wide spectrum and so many of us do not identify as 100% anything. Your sexual attraction to women is totally valid, even though you are now with a man, and you should not feel any shame in that. It is natural to feel attractions to other genders and you can still have a successful and healthy relationship with a man. Have you ever spoken to your partner about your past with women? If you haven't then I recommend you do so, this may alleviate some of the guilt that you feel. Open and clear communication is always paramount in setting healthy boundaries within a relationship. Do you feel this is something you could do? Exploration of your sexuality is a real gift that some people never have the confidence to experience so see it as a good thing rather than something that causes you confusion. I hope this helps, and we're here for you. Remi MultiQuote Quote This Digital Mentor Account is no longer active. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Monsoon Posted July 27, 2020 Share Posted July 27, 2020 Hey Leanne, I just wanted to check how you're doing and if you've had any thoughts about the advice from Remi? -Monsoon MultiQuote Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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